Tuesday, July 10, 2007


Too much blog reading, too little alone time, too much work, too few cool breezes, too much pondering, too little poetry have resulted in 3 questions:

To what do we give the power to make us happy?

Why are we so often satisfied with other people's stories about us?

Is joy a more powerful motivator than fear?

photo: www.youthchg.com/ wgirl2.gif


Anonymous said...

I think that currently in my life I am avoiding the first two questions like the plague ....

as for the third: fear paralyzes me, though I have written great poetry after the fact about fear ....

as for joy: elusive to obtain but deeply rooted; not to be confused with the ephemeral happiness

I think i'll just copy these questions down; let them sink and stir within; maybe when my springtime hits, i will have a few answers.

riseoutofme said...

Now the s#?t has truly hit the fan and the cat is firmly ensconced among the pigeons ....

And I thought I was going to have an easy day ...

Bated breath awaits your answers.

Hann said...

Wow, you got me there. It looks like only 3 questions but man are they tricky. I though about it and are not sure for now yet.

Firstly for Q1: I'd say probably we give the power to people to make us happy when we open ourselves up to them and trust in them and show our vulnerable sides, I'm guessing here?

Q2: I'd say because we probably feel we are accepted and belong and therefor it's a confirmation to us if we hear it?

Q3: I am 50/50 with this one. I think for me with some things it's fear more. I study and work hard out of fear of not having a job or income, ok I do enjoy what I study too. I don't drink or smoke because of the fear of getting cancers but also the joy of living healthy.
I do exercises out of fear for becoming lazy and fat but I do enjoy it too.
LOL, I hope I understood your questions right, but for now that's my answers.

focusfinder said...

We give ourselves the power to make us happy, which, often, in practice, means stopping doing that which makes us unhappy.

Human beings need positive strokes.

In evolutionary/survival terms, fear is the big trigger for that "fight or flight" response, so it's still top of the list of powerful motivators for me.

Princess in Galoshes said...

1) I probably give Lindt Chocolate too much power to make me happy. But it's just too easy. Eventually, though, I think happiness can only come from ourselves.

2) I think it's just simply that it's validating to know other people think about you.

3) Not for me. Both are powerful, but fear is a little more immediate.

Mother of Invention said...

Good questions to ponder...

I think we must give that power to make us happy to ourselves alone. It comes "From The Soul Within"! No one can own that one. They can help sway you though.

We like other people's stories (mostly the good ones!) because we see ourselves in the face of others and consider it a true reflection. Maybe we should tell and believe our own stories a little more often but many are hesitant to do that because they don't know themselves that well (or think they don't)and second guess.

Unfortunately, fear has a much stronger hold on us than it should have so is a stronger motivator. Joy should be the stronger one.

Dave said...

We give the power to what ever or whom ever makes us feel something we need.


Fear is the dominate factor in most of our decisions. We have been raised in a society that says if you don't do this then something bad will happen and we comply or react out of fear. Even when we know that joy (love) is what should be our motivator. Most of the greatest teacher let joy be the motivator and yet we do not learn.

mikaelah said...

great questions
1. over the years just about everything from food, to things to people to the weather... to jobs, to where I have lived, etc. Found out the long way it doesn't work at all to look outside of me for any of it.

2. Well, for me, I have to say I have not been "satisfied"... but because I was busy looking outside of me for the happiness thing, I naturally looked outside of me for who I was ... I wanted others to see me and then tell me what they saw. Found out the long way that that does not work either!!!

3. In my experience, neither works as a motivator. Joy happens as it is inside of everyone just waiting to be pop out and I found I am not in control of it anymore than I am in control of when the sun rises and sets. So I can't use it or try to manipulate it to motivate. Fear seems to get me stuck and paralyzed... so it doesn't do much for me as a motivator. I have tried and continue to try to use it and every single time what I notice is that it does not work at all. The question I am asking myself these days is "Do I need to be motivated to do things?"
Still working on that one.

Barbara said...

I was sure I left a comment, but Blogger must have devoured it!

(1) I can say with certainty that people make me happy.

(2) I am satisfied with other people's stories, dropping the "about us" part.

(3) I surely hope that JOY is a better motivator than FEAR. Whereas fear engenders words like negative, scared, pain, sorrow, joy brings to mind positive, happy, healing, victorious. I think that says it all.

welcome to my universe said...

I know this is an old post of yours, but I just found your blog and love the discussion going on. So here I am joining in, if a little late!

1. We must make ourselves happy. Finding gratitude for all things, doing a 'stocktake' of all that we have both material and non material instead of dwelling on what we don't have is a good place to start.

2. I don't think other peoples stories about us are necessarily the right ones. No one can know my story like I do.

3. Fear is not a motivator it paralyses. It is a negative force that allows you to stagnate. Joy is a positive force that allows you to dance in a forward direction. e.g. I would rather do exercise because it makes me feel and look wonderful, than from the fear that something bad will happen to my health if I don't.

Pauline said...

hello welcome, and welcome. I like your answers - they pretty much match the ones I gave myself...