Thursday, July 09, 2009

Summer Night


The sun set tonight in a blaze of peach and apricot and bright vibrant pink. The whole sky was tinged with color and the still water in the pond reflected back with such intensity that it was hard to tell where the real color ended and the reflection began.

On nights such as this, surrounded by a beauty that leaves me breathless, I wonder what it's all for. And I wonder if the fireflies blinking in the gathering dark notice the sunset or if my friend, dead since January, is still somehow aware of all the things about this place he loved - the long warm summer evenings, the way the grass smells just after it's been mowed, the sweet, chilling taste of ice cream, the sound of crickets singing. This was the sort of night he had to be out in, the way I have to be out in it.

In the distance an owl hoots. The mosquitoes whine and bite, driving me inside. Before I go, I look up, up into the darkening sky, searching for some sign I can believe in, some reassurance that there is more to this world than meets the eye. There is comfort in the star shine, comfort in the rising of a familiar moon, comfort in the fact that even if he cannot know it, I am remembering this summer night for both of us.

8 comments:

PhilipH said...

Really Pauline, you had me misting up here. You miss this chap deeply and it shows. Was he more than just a friend? None of my business of course, but it seems to me that you had, at least, a very deep and emotional attachment to him.

Imagination and wonderment of the vastness of the night sky, and the multitudinous of the stars and further galaxies begs the sort of questions you ask.

Phil

Pauline said...

Oh Philip, I do miss him. I'd known and loved him since childhood and never thought I'd have to live in the world without him. I like to think he gets to experience the earth again through my thoughts and it gives me pleasure to share all the life still burgeoning around me.

Barbara said...

I'm glad your friend is with you in spirit. I love the idea of being able to experience something for someone who is no longer tangibly around. It will be interesting to see things "from the other side."

The pink sky photo is amazing. I'm not sure I've ever seen the sky that color.

meggie said...

I so know that feeling, for a friend now dead & gone. I mourn his comforting passing every day. Somehow I felt so safe, knowing he had my back. Now he is gone, but I need to think he is still part of my life.

Molly said...

Reading this made juice squirt from my teeth. A dear friend of mine died earlier this year too....very sobering....weren't we supposed to live forever? And set the world to rights?
I was right there with you, looking up at that gorgeous sky,smelling the new mown grass, listening to the crickets, swatting the mosquitoes, and wondering........
Peace to you Pauline...

herhimnbryn said...

And so in thinking of him, he was there, wondering at it all with you.

Pauline said...

Barbara - sometimes just thinking of loved ones who've gone on ahead brings them back almost close enough to touch. We often have skies that color...

Ah meggie, exactly!

Molly - I thought we were supposed to live forever too. We had a pact, he and I, that whichever of us went first would "save a spot" for the other. Missing him is hard.

HHB - yes, I think he was...

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